Tuesday, April 11, 2006

She Doesn't Understand "SIT" But Dick Jokes, Those She Understands

of the Two Assasins, aka my dogs Daphne and Roxie, only one of them really watches tv and that's Roxie. and not just when there are other dogs on tv. no, she is also enthralled by American Justice and one day i found her watching Columbo. she is very interested in tv and i think i caught her reprogramming my TiVo the other day. well, i sure as hell don't recall recording Footballer's Wives, so it must have been her. she obviously has a taste for the dramatic.

now, Daphne on the other hand. rarely pays attention to the tv. i think she is more the literary type, maybe. while i am at work all day she composes haikus extolling the virtues of kibble and Nylabones. then she eats the haikus. so, i never actually see the poetry, but i have to believe she has talents other than stealing my socks out of the laundry basket.

anywho, last night i was on the couch watching "An Evening With Kevin Smith." this is not the first time i have seen it, but it was Daphne's first time. because i have heard it before i was not laughing out loud or doing anything else that Daphne would be reacting to. i was sitting quietly and knitting. she, on the other hand, was RIVETED by him, just RIVETED. her eyes never left the screen.

at one point, Kevin Smith is telling the story of the first time her had sex with his now wife. and in classic Kevin Smith style, it's detailed and raunchy. when he gets to the part about his wife dry humping him so hard that the zipper in his jeans mangled his dick, that's when Daphne started wildly wagging her tail and barking at the tv. it takes Kevin about 6 minutes to tell the story and the whole time she is wag wag wagging her tail. i mean, i have to applaud her good taste as i am obviously a Kevin Smith fan myself, but the dick jokes? really? that's what floats her boat?

if i come tonight to find her watching my "Clerks" DVD she is going to be in big trouble.